Little Vegan Delights
Many people live in under the false impression that vegans are picky eaters who have to plot out meals for weeks in advance or risk starvation. This misconception is almost certainly born out of the fact that we have to refuse verboten snacks that our well-meaning and warm-hearted omnivorous loved ones offer to us. In actuality, anyone who has been a vegan more than a month or so probably has some favorite vegan treats to reach for when your day has been crappy, your stomach is grumpy, and you (inevitably) have to fart from all the fibrous vegetables you’ve been eating. With the aim of educating my readers and further putting myself on exhibition to the Internet at large, here are some of my favorite little vegan delights:
- Bacos and Vegenaise on whole grain toast. The first time I made this Allyson turned up her nose at it. I made her take a bite and instantly converted her to the saving knowledge of savory snack perfection. Vegenaise is actually—honest to God—better than real mayonnaise. I kid you not. The Bacos add a nice smoky bacony flavor without killing any piglets. Even if you’re not vegan, give this snack a try. In fact, if you know me in meatspace, just ask me to make one for you.
- Luna bars. Luna bars are my addiction of choice. Imagine a sweet granola-like bar in host of wonderful flavors like chai, peanut butter cookie, and chocolate pecan pie. They provide me with enough vitamins that I could live for quite a long time if theses were my only food source. If the Christ crackers at Communion were Luna bars, I would convert to Catholicism right now.
- Vegenaise and Sriracha chili sauce. Individually these two condiments already rule the world, but together they merge into the vegan Voltron of condiments—the vegan spicy sauce. That’s right, the spicy sauce you get on your spicy tuna rolls is nothing more than Sriracha mixed with mayo. And since Vegenaise is better than mayo, vegan spicy sauce is so amazing that you’ll need to smoke a cigarette after consuming it. What do I eat it on? Effing everything. I have been known to take plastic containers of it with me to Subway. I have dipped carrots in it. A better question would be what wouldn’t I eat this on?
- Starbucks soy no-whip valencia mocha. Do you like those chocolate oranges? Well, imagine one of those in liquid form. I don’t care if Starbucks is the devil. The devil makes a deliciously sexy vegan beverage that I would gleefully suckle through a rubber nipple.
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